Empty

Peering into my soul, I see it suspended emotionless in a corner. As if it has been wrung dry of feelings. I don't feel like feeling anything. Don't feel like saying anything. I can just sit here and stare into a wall for hours.

I find this silence peaceful and restless both. Peaceful because I get to sit here and drown myself in my own thoughts, without being judged or scrutinised. Restless, because it feels like a quiet that I was anticipating but underprepared for.

In some moments like this I crave human touch so much and I try to replicate it by placing my own hand on me. This is just sad.

I wish I could cry a bit, but I feel too empty to dispense any tears or feelings. I know it will be ok, I can move through this. But sometimes this just feels pointless. Why do I need to brave this? Why can't I just lie here and slowly fade away. Who would miss me?