Frustration

My mind is possibly my arch-nemesis. Talking me up and cajoling to do nice things for self and telling me how I have everything under control. And then when a moment of frustration arrives, then completely flip its position and remind me how I am on this path to crash and burn. Bloody thing.

I don't know how much personal growth can really be extracted out of someone. I feel like I am constantly wiggling through the cracks in this rubble that I am caught under. So much so, that at this point I have lost the sense of direction. I don't even know if I am trying to get out or go deeper. And then I tell myself, No pressure, no diamonds.

I have been tracking my mood over time with data to see if I am overall getting better or feeling worse and what is affecting me the most. So far it has been 2 weeks since I started capturing it. And I am generally more down than up. But hopefully this will get better with time. Good days and bad days.

Hopefully the only way from here is up.